Feeling all the feels tonight.
I acknowledge it.
I see and feel this longing and fearing of never being ready or finding epic love.
I do believe that the desire would not be this strong in me if I were not meant for it.
I am teachable and growing.
The feedback from spirit shows that I am perfect and ready for it.
I feel the droplets of lack flow to the top as the waves of creation energy boil and churn.
I let the lack flow through me and out.
I chase it with deep love and acceptance of these feelings.
I will not make myself wrong for feeling anything.
I will cry and kick and flail at times.
Scream in the night air.
Where the fuck are you? Where the fuck are you?
Quit dicking around and come show up for me, for us.
I yell to moon my cheeks stained with tears.
Fear gripping at my heart.
While the flame of belief and trust burns in my heart and loosens the hand of doubt.
My root chakra feeling 9 months pregnant with all that I am calling in.
Teach me wind.
Teach me earth.
Teach me fire.
Teach me water.
How do I let in the beautiful things I have created.
I sit with this question.
I don't push, I don't pull.
I allow it to hang in the air, heavy and awkward.
Knowing in my bones this is wholeness.
-- Jana Beam Powers